Mar. 3rd, 2004

belle_lu_1986: (Default)
If any of my friends irl find this thing then please please don't read it. I'm trusting you to, I just need somewhere for myself, somewhere private.

Right then, my first *proper* entry in this thing. I'm at school in a computer room and eating cake and I've managed to get crumbs on the keyboard, oh well, I know why they say no food in these rooms now though!!

Ok so a bit of background about me,
My name is Lucy, I'm 17 years old (18 in may) and I'm a student at a sixth form in my old school doing A levels in Biology, Chemistry and Maths. I used to Self Harm and I occasionally have thoughts related to eating disorders as I'm a fat thing. However, thats enough as I'm keeping this journal for myself more than anything.

Today, when I got up I had decided that I wasn't going to eat, I was going to just start fasting and lose some weight in that way. However, by 11 o clock I had decided that I was hungry and went and brought food from the canteen, I bought loads of the stuff too so now I'm even fatter than I was this morning. I'm not exactly feeling too great today, partly mentally and partly physically, prob something to do with the way that my period just started (not pregnant for another month, the joys of the pill!) I feel so so fat, ewwwwwwwwww. I'm disgusted at myself.

However its now over 11 weeks since I last SI'ed which is cool, its not exactly a problem for me any more, still have scars though :-s.

Lu

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belle_lu_1986

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